Not Sure....(But Hopeful!! :)

Well, it's been a crazy week.. The photo shoot with Blindeye Photography went well. Horst was great to work with.. he ended up taking sum 500+ shots! I was very pleased with them & think it can only get better once we learn to work together better. We shoot again tomorrow. With the weather being miserable now for weeks (thunderstorms, rain, cooler).. we may have to shoot inside (a Training Shoot at one of my gyms). He is going to take some video footage as well as still shots. I'm excited about this... Up until now all my video has been shot by me (with a boring fixed perspective on the tripod).. no panning or zooming.. This will be much more dynamic & I won't have to continually stare at the camera viewfinder to check lighting, position & pose. I can actually concentrate fully on what I'm doing!!! Ok, it doesn't take much to make me happy.. LOL

I've got the first two initial pages of www.harcorebody.ca online.. But I have lots of tedious photo/video processing work to do yet in order to make a structured/formatted & organized media library..

I have to give it some thought--file quality, continuity & size are all so important to the look and functionality of the site (Boy do I HATE being a perfectionist some times.. it's hard to get anything done QUICKLY..LOL).

I have so many ideas that have potential. I have waaayyy to many things to do in any one given day. In fact, I'm still up working (it's 1:29am as I type this.. and yes, I'm heading to bed as soon as this is published).

This is the first summer since 2005 that I haven't been planning for sure to do a show.. It's strange.. I feel lost in a way being "uncertain". I think I kind of enjoy the military discipline & drive being engaged.. I think it's a challenge that I can't resist.. I love being able to over-rule what my body WANTS.

I'm trying a bit of a fat load instead of a carb load tonight.. seems to be working amazingly well. I also did 40minutes of cardio today & went tanning.. I prefer to get natural sunlight, but the weather has just been crap. I hope it turns around soon... summer is half over!

This summer Sam's been really changing.. he's truly a fine young man--I am so blessed. He's grown an inch since summer began.. & he's starting to train with me & eat healthy clean foods with me. It's very expensive, but it's not just a bodybuilding/fitness thing----IT'S A HEALTH & WELLNESS THING. :))

My biggest cheat this week was two yoghurt cones.. (not at once LOL).. only 2g of fat each.. but a cheat is a cheat.. when I eat foods like that it shows the next day.. atleast I'm lean enough that I can "fix" it in two days by just keeping my diet in check. Even if I don't compete in September.. getting & staying ripped isn't a "waste".. It's experience in refining my show prep & it also enables me to take the best photo/video possible while the weather is warm.

I hope to get in as many photo & video shoots as I can with Horst (Blindeye Photography) while it is nice enough. We will have to get creative.. We both want to keep the material fresh...not always doing the same thing with a different outfit on in each video or photoshoot. LOL It would be nice to have my next show professionally documented with me as the main subject. I'd like to show how I prep..what my life & routine are like as I get ready for a show.

I think I've broached every major thought process on my mind tonight.. I need to have one more rice cake with peanut butter before bed..

Goodnight :))